A lot can happen in a year.

It's true. A lot of good can happen in a year! At this time last year I had a broken heart, my applications for graduate school were in and I was anxious to fly home to Georgia for Thanksgiving. This year my heart is mended, I'm finishing my first semester of graduate school (with flying colors), and excited for spend time with my extended family for Thanksgiving. It's been a bit of a bumpy ride, but think about what bumps do. When I was in high school, Doyle would drive me and Ben home in his jeep. He would hit the speed bumps and we would fly. Yes, speed bumps are there to get us to slow down, but they can also take us really high. That's what they can do for us. Speed bumps can help us slow down, get perspective and take us higher.

I'm pretty sure my speed bump days aren't over, and I don't think they ever will be. This is how we grow and progress. So, if your dealing with a broken heart, let it mend. If you're waiting for word back about graduate school, wait actively. If you're anxious to leave, take a minute to enjoy where you are. Let speed bumps take you higher to our Heavenly Father. 

Chastity

There has been a lot of talk out there about who is responsible for chastity before marriage. Guess what? "(Men and women) have a sacred responsibility to rear their children in love and righteousness." This righteousness does not magically appear when two people are married. Even when they are married in the temple of the Lord.

Instead it comes through preparation as individuals and a couple commit to one another. It continues long after the marriage has been performed as these two people strive to become celestial. So men and women can both prepare to rear their children in love and righteousness when they live chaste lives before marriage. Some people would say this is "old fashioned". Guess what, it is! Marriage was ordained by God. That means it has been around for a very, very long time. So, be chaste. It isn't a matter of gender, but instead genealogy. Because you are a child of God, you should treat yourself, and others, as the children of a King.

P.S. Doesn't that temple look like a castle? This is "The house of the Lord"- the house of a king. Because we are His children, THIS is where we go to become like Him. I love that. 

What I learned about relationships today: Communication

I realized something today. Sometimes, even when you do your best to communicate, it doesn't seem to work. Even when you mirror what the person is saying, explain yourself clearly, stay calm express your desire to understand their viewpoint, it still doesn't "work". So, here was my question: What is considered a successful communication? Joining the Gospel and secular research together, here is my answer: 

1. "The real challenge that we face in our communications with others is to condition our hearts to have Christlike feelings for all of Heavenly Father's children. When we develop this concern for the condition of others, we then will communicate with them as the Savior would. We will then warm the hearts of those who may be suffering in silence" - L. Lionel Kendrick 

We communicate out of love and concern for other people. We want to see them as God sees them and we want to better understand their point of view. We cannot control others' reaction to our communications, but we can try our best to effectively communicate our message so they will understand. We CAN control our reaction to their reaction. 

2. In our communication, there are filters that we have to pass through. Here is the sender-receiver communication model. 

                                                                            Source: Studyblue.com 
So, multiple things can happen. We can either not convey our message correctly because of an inability to use the right words, we can use the wrong body language or the other person can have a negative view of us that distorts the message we are sending. No wonder communication is so difficult. 

But there is hope! I am weak in my communication skills with others and it wouldn't surprise me if other people are too. Remember the promise give by a loving Father in heaven:

"I would show unto the world that ^afaith is things which are^bhoped for and ^cnot seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no ^dwitness until after the ^etrial of your faith... 
 And if men come unto me I will show unto them their^aweakness. I ^bgive unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my ^cgrace is sufficient for all men that ^dhumble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make ^eweak things become strong unto them."